June 30, 2005
Victim Impact Statement of Milton Vasich
Regarding the Death of My Oldest Son - Gregory Vasich
on April 9, 2004
As I write this at the start of summer 2005, I think of what Greg would be doing
now if he were still alive. Greg was going to move to Minneapolis with his
sweetheart Jenny late in the summer of 2004, after taking a planned trip to
Europe with Jenny that same summer. Carol and I only found out about the trip
during Greg’s 23rd birthday celebration on February 27, 2004. I remember
thinking how I took a similar trip when I was about his age. It was a trip I
remember well, and he and Jenny were planning to visit many of the same places I
went. I was so happy for him. After working so hard and graduating with honors
with a degree from the University of Illinois in December 2003, he was about to
start a new and exciting chapter in his life.
Little could we imagine that barely 5 weeks after that birthday celebration,
Greg would die in a horrible and tragic crash that could have easily been
avoided. After attending a lecture at Northwestern University with a friend,
Greg was coming home early on Good Friday, April 9, 2004. At 2:30 A.M. Friday
morning, Greg’s car was struck by a car that ran a red light driven by Mark
Schoger. I’m angry that my son, who was extremely careful, who didn’t use drugs
or abuse alcohol, was the victim of a crash where the other driver did the exact
opposite. Driving under the influence of cocaine and with faulty brakes, Mark
Schoger demonstrated a reckless disregard for his life, his passenger’s life,
and the lives of anyone else on the road that night.
Our lives changed dramatically that morning last April 2004. The heartbreak of
having to tell our sons that the brother they loved and respected was dead was
the worst thing imaginable. Greg was their guide, their friend whenever they
needed him. Greg provided encouragement to his brother Mike in his music career
and had great love and respect for him. Being only 2 years younger than Greg,
Mike was close to his brother and they kept in close contact. Now, suddenly,
that source of support and friendship was gone. Greg missed Mike’s senior
recital and graduation from college. He will obviously miss so much more.
Greg’s brother Chris relied heavily for support from Greg. Greg was wise beyond
his years. He guided Chris and advised in his studies and was very supportive in
his track career. Greg had a message for Chris when he achieved a personal best
in track – don’t stop there. I have no doubt that Greg’s inspirational message
and support helped propel Chris to become an all-state track athlete. I feel
terrible that Greg wasn’t there to celebrate Chris’ success.
I’m especially sad that our youngest son Paul did not have more time with Greg.
Paul was only eight when Greg left for college. We were so happy when Greg
finished college that he was going to home for a few months before his planned
move to Minneapolis. Greg and Paul began to develop a special bond while Greg
was home. It was a shock for Paul, after just turning 13, to lose his oldest
brother. Paul had to grow up in a hurry after Greg died.
Although I’m very proud of our sons and how they have bravely carried on after
losing their brother, their lives will never be the same. They have tragically
lost a brother who would have been a wonderful uncle and brother-in-law. They
were so close and deserved to live their lives together and share the
experiences of marriage, fatherhood, jobs and so much more. I’m very sad that
those experiences won’t be shared with Greg.
More than a son, I lost a friend when Greg died. Greg was as devoted to his
family as we were to him. While at the University of Illinois, Greg was a member
of the Marching Illini. The marching band played at all of the football games,
and Carol and I would try to go as often as we could. As it turned out, I ended
up attending most of the games. I spent a lot of time with him after the games
talking about sports and other topics while grabbing a bite to eat. We shared
many of the same interests and enjoyed being together. I’m angry and heartbroken
that we cannot spend any more times like those again. Greg was always willing to
get together and sometimes invited me along to be with him and his friends. We
got to know Greg’s friends quite well, as he would invite them over to the house
quite often. We grieve at the loss of his and their presence together.
Of course, the rest of the family is grieving at Greg’s loss. Greg was
especially loved by his grandparents. He was the oldest grandchild for both
sides of the family, and family get-togethers were times that were very
important to him. I’ll never forget the enormous outpouring of grief when I told
my mother of Greg’s death. Everyone in the family (great aunts and uncles,
aunts, uncles, and cousins) was looking forward to Greg’s future – a wedding,
family, and much more. Greg loved his extended family and they loved him.
Regardless of where his future took him, I knew that he would always make time
for his family.
Greg had many friends, from the time he got to high school and throughout his 4
and a half years at the University of Illinois. As painful as it was to see how
Greg’s brothers, Jenny, and our family were mourning his loss, it was equally
painful to see his friends in mourning. So many wonderful friends, trying to
come to grips with the tragedy and understand how something so senseless could
have happened. Many of his friends had just finished school also and were
looking forward to the next stage in their lives with anticipation. It hurt to
see these wonderful young men and women in such a state of grief, anguish, and
disbelief that something this terrible could have happened to their dear friend.
Carol and I have tried our best to encourage our sons to take care of themselves
and seek help when needed. Both Chris and Paul have participated in group
discussions at school with classmates who have suffered a similar loss. Chris
has helped others to get through their grief, and I’m very proud at how he’s
been able to think of others during this difficult period. Mike went back to
school shortly after the funeral and had to bear the loss without the benefit of
having family nearby.
Ultimately, we will have learn to live with our grief. It is very hard for me to
accept this reality, especially knowing that many years may lie ahead living
with this loss. The real tragedy is that Greg, who cared about and was loved by
so many, who worked so hard to prepare himself for life, had his life taken from
him by someone who didn’t value life. Mark Schoger obviously didn’t value his
own life, the life of his passenger, or anyone else he might encounter on April
9, 2004. If he did care he wouldn’t have been using drugs and driving a car that
he knew was unsafe. The lives of others need to be protected from someone with
such blatant disregard for the value and sanctity of life.